The following list are things I've seen parents do to their kids that irk me. I'm sure you think you're being an awesome parent, but honestly, you're not. Please take a look at the list below, and adjust your parenting style accordingly. Your child will be grateful! And you wont look like such a jerk to them.
THINGS NOT TO DO TO YOUR CHILD
10. Make him eat all his food: The body knows when the body is full. Why would you force a kid to clean his plate? Do you force yourself to clean YOUR plate? If so, you might be over weight...and thats probably one of the reasons! There's nothing wrong with pushing back from the table. Yeah kids in other countries may be starving, but your kid stuffing all the food down his own throat isnt benefiting them is it? Theyre still gonna be hungry! Forcing kids to finish food they dont want promotes unhealthy eating habits and obesity. If he's not eating enough, there are plenty of dietary supplements made for kids who are picky or light eaters. Great tasting supplements like shakes and snacks which are packed with vitamins and nutrients.
9. Make your kid finish his food before he can take a drink: One of the things that annoys me most is when a parent makes a kid put his drink down and forces him to eat! Why would you do that!? Maybe the kid is thirsty! I never see adults eat all their food first and THEN drink. Your mouth would be dry as hell and you wouldn't even want to eat any more. Think about how you feel while youre eating. You get thirsty and need to take a swig before you can continue. Why would you think your child would be any different? Honestly if you want your kid to eat more, let him wash it down. If he fills up on his drink and doesn't want any more food, so what?
Give him something healthy to drink and its a win/win situation. If he's filling up on Kool Aid or Pepsi (yes I've seen a parent give a child Pepsi *smh*) that's YOUR fault, not his. Studies show that drinking more with your food cuts back on your food intake which helps keep you slim. Stop forcing fatness on your kids! You force them to eat then let them play video games all day and wonder why he's chubby.
8. Force him to fight: "If you let someone beat u up at school, imma beat ur ass when u get home" is not a good tactic. I know you think that makes your kid tough but that just traumatizes a kid and forces him to face TWO bullies, one being YOU! How about putting him in a self defense class like Kung Fu so he can learn to defend himself with confidence, and discipline. I'd advise putting your child in self defense classes as early as 5. I'm glad the issue on bullying is being noticed now and people are trying to combat it. But don't make your child go at it alone. The outcome might not be great.
7. Make your kid dress how YOU want em to look: I'm sure you think your baby looks adorable in 2 pig tails with giant bows and patent leather shoes. Awwwww *pinches cheeks*... To the kids at school, not so much. You must want your kids to get their ass kicked at school. Let them dress how they want to dress as long as its not provocative or offensive, let your kids be the free, creative spirits that they are! Even if you hate it, or don't understand it, its not for you to like or understand. I'm sure the kids at school will "get it"...and wish their parents were as cool as your kids' parents! Your kid will get a lot more respect and he will be more confident if he likes how he looks. A kid being confident in his appearance helps with every aspect of school, socially as well as academically.
6. Let your kids do whatever and say whatever they want: "Spare the rod, spoil the child" is a true statement! Kids need boundaries and rules, otherwise they're just little assholes. If you don't discipline your kids at home, someone else is gonna discipline them outside, and that someone else isn't going to love your kid so they won't care if they hurt your kid! Teach your kids manners, respect and discipline. You don't want people to hate your kids. You can't watch them every moment of the day, and you want to know that they're not being mistreated when you're not around. Don't let them run around screaming in public like maniacs! Tell them to go sit their narrow asses down somewhere before they get snatched up! Disciplining your kids is a good thing. Im not saying abuse them and beat the hell out of them. You know what I mean!
5. Let them play video games and watch TV all day: the quickest way to get dense in the waist and in the mind space is to let your kids play video games and watch tv all day. I don't care if he is 6 or 16...allot him a certain amount of time to play games and watch tv, then make him go outside and play! Kids need outdoor athletic activities to promote a healthy body and a healthy creative mind. Let them use their imagination sometimes! However, definitely don't take video games and tv away all together. Video games and television are a big part of kids' social lives. In order to communicate with other kids, they have to know what other kids know. Don't make your kid an outcast.
4. Shelter them too much:I know you want your precious baby to stay innocent forever but unfortunately we don't live in an innocent world. Kids need to know about certain things, so they know what to avoid. I remember I joked with one of my friends' kids because she had stumbled and almost fell. I asked her if she was drunk. Her mom reacted like I had spoken the foulest of four letter words. "Don't say that to her. She doesn't know what drunk is." She told me.
I told her she needs to know what drunk is! What if she's with a friend and the friend has a drunk parent who offers to drive her home. If she doesn't know what drunk is, she will get right in the car with a drunk driver! What if she sees a can of beer somewhere and thinks its soda *sip sip* *cue dramatic horns here*. There's such a thing as too sheltered! Educate your kids about drugs and alcohol! Educate them about inappropriate touch so they know how to identify Chester the Molester and get away from him. Kids are not delicate flowers, they're resilient people and they're in for the fight of their lives. Arm them, so that they stand a chance!
3. Deprive them of eating candy: I believe everything is ok in moderation. I'm not saying pump them full of sugar until their teeth fall out. But there's nothing sadder than that one kid who's watching the other kids get down with their lollipops while he eats carrots. That's fuctup. Give him the lollipop, brush his teeth and keep it pushin! You only live once and childhood is such a short part of life! Let your kid enjoy his childhood! Its better he get the candy out of his system with his baby teeth and not his adult teeth! lol When you deprive your kid of something, they'll just go crazy with it when you're not around. He'll be loading up on sweets as soon as he gets to school. Let him be a kid!
2. Tell him "because I said so" or "what I say goes end of story": I know sometimes your kid gets on your last nerve and you might go to the above answers as a last resort...and there's nothing wrong with that. But sometimes a kid asks why because he honestly needs to know the answer. If you tell a kid "no" and explain why, the fact that you said "no" might not bug them so much. "Can I go spend the night at Tisha's house?"...."NO"..."Why?"....."Because I said so" will just make u look like a jerk who ruins all the fun. But "because Tisha's father uses drugs and I don't trust him and her brother hangs out with a bad crowd and I don't want you around them" makes sense and your kid might say "hey u got a point there". At least theyll know you have a valid reason and you're not just being difficult. Yes you owe your child an explanation sometimes.
1. Be your child's friend without being her parent: There needs to be a happy medium. Its great to be a friend to your kid! You are the best friend your kid will ever have because you care about them more than anyone else will. Talk to them candidly! Play with them and have fun with them. But be sure that they know you're the parent and set certain boundaries that they know not to cross. It sucks to have a parent who's too strict, no fun and all about business. But it also sucks to have a parent who thinks they're 16 and wanna go to the mall with you and look for dates. Ummmm give your kids their space, let them know you're there when they need you. And don't baby them and kiss them in front of their friends! Everyone hates that!
I hope you adhere to the above parenting suggestions...I know its hard sometimes, but think about when you were a kid. How did you feel when some of the above stuff happened to you! You don't want your kids to feel that way! Take the positive aspects of parenting that you learned from your parents, and get rid of the old fashioned stuff that isnt within the best interest of your child. Come up with new parenting techniques that work for you and your kids! You and your children will be much happier people!
I was blessed to grow up with an awesome mom who followed the suggestions above, and I turned out to be a pretty decent, well rounded and outgoing person! I remember all too well being a child, and being babysat by people who sometimes tried to make me eat all my food and things like that! It was the worst feeling in the world! I also remember some of my friends going through some of the things listed above! Kids shouldnt be stressed out over BS! Kids are kids! Let them be happy! Theyll have plenty of time to stress out over BS when theyre adults!
What kind of parenting tips would you like to add?
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